Dan Scott started a great conversation here about phrases to quit using in kids ministry. Kenny Conley comments in that conversation about the process we go through as Christ followers. Here is what Kenny writes.
…I’ve become a lot more comfortable with the idea that becoming a Christ Follower for many people isn’t an alter call experience, but a process. I’ve talked to too many people who can’t tell you when they became a Christ Follower because it was more of a process for them... I’ve had parents get frustrated when their kids “asked Jesus in their heart” and they’d already done it before… Could it be that this is a process? Kids may have made a heart decision, but their mind still hasn’t caught up (they don’t completely comprehend)…
I’ve talked to many parents with teens that have ‘grown up’ in church. They stand before me confused because their daughter made a mistake and is now pregnant. Mom/dad look at me and say,
“She accepted Jesus when she was 6, she never missed a Sunday, we volunteered every Wednesday night… now my 16 yr old is pregnant. What happened?”
Are we offering a checklist? Are we giving them hoops to jump through?
Don’t miss church.
Bring your kids to our events.
Do this bible study.
Pray this prayer.
We forget sometimes that mom/dad want to do this thing right. If we throw a perceived ‘recipe for success’ out there, are we inviting parents to assume that following the recipe will produce the perfect child? Or at least a child with no MAJOR issues like teen pregnancy, social drinking, or addiction to 80’s hair band music.
I question our approach often. I work to explain to mom/dad that choosing Christ is a series of discoveries and decisions. It begins with discovering what He did for us and why. Then continues with decisions… the everyday, ordinary decision of choosing what He says is best verses what we think is best.
Is anyone else (parent or Children’s pastor) wrestling this down?
I blogged a little about this yesterday. You can catch up here.
Consider the gifts God has placed in each of your family members…
Imagine these gifts engaged on a mission…
Imagine your family embracing a cause…
There are community mission opportunities to engage your family. Some coordinated by your local church. Some waiting to be coordinated by you.
Where can you take a group of families to engage with your community this June?
Featured here are friends who saw an unmet need in their community and were brave enough to do something about. These are amazing people. Take a click and see where God leads you…
Check me out doing this all in sequence. What’s up with that?!? Usually I toss in a few random posts just to keep you guessing. Not so, this time. Let’s keep rolling. If you missed the first two, you can catch up here.
Skill #3: Dialogue with God
The environments created at home and at church will be one of the first places children and teenagers learn to pray
Talking with God is not a difficult thing to demonstrate. Actually doing it is the secret. Though mealtime prayers are a ritual in many homes; breakfast, lunch and dinner are not the only times to dialogue with God. We don’t stop talking to our kids at breakfast, do we?
Here’s a fun idea to establish a habit of prayer with your kids:
Every time the bell rings at school, just say hello to God.
It draws them back to a focus on Him and encourages an opportunity to talk with Him.
As a Christ-follower, what could serve as a constant reminder to just say hello to God?
As a parent, ministry leader/volunteer, what ideas do you have that would teach a Christ-follower the habit of dialogue with God?
I’ll leave you with this little nugget. Who could resist.
We recently celebrated Baptisms at LifeChurch.tv. My passion centers around equipping parents for the long haul, so I lean toward providing ‘tools’ for them rather than just doing it myself. I love the idea of mom/dad having a rich God-conversation on the playground… like baptism. If I can give them the right questions to ask along with the right responses to look for, they can make a determination regarding their child’s readiness for these milestones.
The last baptism weekend was touching when a dad approached me right before his daughter’s baptism. He said,
Three weeks ago my 8 year old asked about salvation. I was able to go to LifeKIDS.tv, find information about salvation, have a great conversation with my little girl then lead her through a prayer to ask Jesus into her life. Last week she wanted to know about baptism. Again, I went to LifeKIDS.tv and found information about baptism. Today I’m baptizing my daughter because she wants everyone to know what God has done. I want you to know what you have done. You empowered me to have conversations with my daughter I never thought I could have. Thank you
That was amazing. And he has no idea how much that meant to hear.
I need to learn more…
As a parent, what additional tools can your kids ministry leaders put in your hands?
As a ministry leader, what tools do you offer your parents?
We all want to pray effectively. What’s the point if we don’t?
Yet I listen to people pray for things that are already promised to us.
“Lord, please be with me during this time in my life.” “Father, just give this family peace as they walk through this trial.”
As well intentioned as they are… these prayers are redundant. God has already promised His presence. He’s already committed to never leave you or forsake you. He’s promised His peace is everpresent in our time of need. So, it seems like praying for those things aren’t necessary.
I don’t need to ask God to be with me… I need to ask Him to help me turn my face toward Him.
I don’t need to ask Him to give me peace… I need to ask for His help to rest in that peace.
If I don’t know His promises to me, then I won’t know what to ask Him to help me cling to in my trials.
Oh… and another one… my friend reminded me of this…
“Lord, keep me safe.”
Since when did my own safety take precedence over His Glory in my life? How about praying for His Glory to take precedence in my life in the midst of whatever path He leads me down?
We all want our resources to go as far as they can. The best bang for our buck.
Funny how I believe that is true… I desire a great return on my investment… and yet my time is poorly spent.
Time is the one commodity you can spend and never get back.
So why do I spend so little time in prayer?
When I think about it… time spent in prayer has got to be a great investment.
I receive a periodic email from ‘The Pastor’s Coach’ at Injoy.com. Here is what I walked away with.
God has chosen to work through people. As church leaders we are charged with the mission He gave us. We all have a choice, we can engage the mission equipped merely with our leadership gifts and talents or we can engage the mission based on the time we spend on our knees asking God for guidance, power and blessing upon our gifts and talents. So, let me ask you a personal question. No one is looking – be honest. How much time and energy do you invest in prayer?
If your answer is that you fall short in the area of prayer, don’t let this become a road to guilt. That’s what the enemy wants. Think grace. But get in the game and pray. If you are tempted to ask “how much” you should pray, be careful, that can lead toward more guilt and even legalism.
It’s true that more time in prayer is better than less time. But the actual amount isn’t the point as much as your consistency, passion and heart behind the prayer. I am making a big assumption that you want to pray. But like many church leaders, you find the busyness of your life crowding out time for prayer. I urge you to make time to pray. Carve out the time. Make it happen. Fight for it. Let everything else wait. Whether you pray 20 minutes a day or 2 hours a day is between you and God. The point is to talk to God and listen for His voice. Beyond these set-apart times of prayer, scripture tells us to pray without ceasing. I’ve learned that, for me, praying without ceasing means to carry an attitude of awareness, dependence, and communication (listening) to God throughout the day.
Interesting how the gifts and talents God employs in me were never intended to be powered strictly by me. They were placed inside me and designed in such a way to be power by God. I know that… and yet I don’t act on it.
We recently celebrated Baptisms at LifeChurch.tv. My passion centers around equipping parents for the long haul, so I lean toward providing ‘tools’ for them rather than just doing it myself. I love the idea of mom/dad having a rich God-conversation on the playground… like baptism. If I can give them the right questions to ask along with the right responses to look for, they can make a determination regarding their child’s readiness for these milestones.
