Kyle and I have walked through Colossians 3 with Keegan & Josie for the past two weeks.  It’s the scriptural focus of the message series, Road Trip, they’re watching in LifeKIDS each weekend.  I love the fact that our family is focused on this one chapter in scripture.  The time spent just reading together has been refreshing.

Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience... Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony.  Col 12 & 14

I wish I could say this has been my demeanor the past few weeks.  Yet I’m amazed at how difficult it has been to live this out.  Ministry has been challenging, to put it lightly.  It seems that the simplest of processes in kids ministry aren’t so simple right now.  The level of patience, gentleness, and humility I’ve shown is less than I care to confess.

Why is it when I ask God to increase my patience, gentleness and humility… He likes to show me all the areas where it lacks the most?

Whenever we celebrate baptisms at LifeChurch.tv it’s an exciting event.  We draw a lot of attention to it and intentionally create a celebratory moment for what God is doing.  It’s a great experience.

The most common conversations I have with parents center around this question, “Is my child ready for baptism?”.

A great question that is not easily answered.  My goal as a kids pastor is to equip mom and dad for those little, off-the-cuff conversations they find themselves in on the way home from school one day.  “Mom, when will I be baptized?”

There are a handful of questions I ask a child to determine their readiness for baptism.  For the purpose of equipping, I put these questions on paper and give them to mom and dad so they can be the one leading this conversation with their child… not me.   You can read them here.  Though these questions are helpful in determining a child’s understanding of baptism, I confess this is not a full-proof ‘tool’ for determining readiness.

Why?  Because we can know the right answers to questions and yet not display evidence that it is true in our lives.  I may have all the right responses to the question, but if my actions do not reflect life-change then my words are hollow.

So, how do we equip parents to view these questions through the lens of life-change rather than right responses?

In kids ministry, there are certain circumstances that naturally draw attention, generate excitement, and provoke anticipation. 

new building project

remodeled space

revamped curriculum/teaching

These circumstances naturally instigate a wave of excitement and anticipation.  As a leader, you can ride the crest of that wave for a while.

In the same way, something that occurs weekly and doesn’t ’seem’ to change from week-to-week can generate a sense of redundancy.  Leading through the perceived ‘redundancy’ is a leadership challenge.  Here are a few things I’m working through to cultivate anticipation among my volunteer team.

• Life-Change Stories:  nothing beats a great life-change story to remind volunteers why they do what they do. Open their mind to the potential for that hour they spend with the kids
• Thermometer vs. Thermostat:  one reflects the temperature… the other determines the temperature.  I need to be a better Thermostat for my volunteer team
• Keep the main thing the main thing:  don’t lose sight of the bigger picture.  always draw it back to why you’re there to begin with.  Why did we open the doors?  Why did we put so much time and effort into preparing?  For the very kids entering the doors right now.  Even if one kid came to LifeKIDS that day… every step taken to prepare was worth it.  Every child matters.  Every child is celebrated.

As a pastor I confess that my job can get in the way of my family.  It’s an ongoing challenge to ensure my family comes before my ministry.  There are moments I do that well… and moments I do not.

Last week I had a moment that I did not.

Though numbers are not the focus, we certainly track attendance as a barometer to help us determine the success/effectiveness of an event.  With goals set, we chase those ‘carrots’ all year long with the best intentions.  One such goal is to maintain strong attendance in our discipleship program from August to May.

Why do you need to know this?  Setting the stage, I guess.

Last week was the first week of school.  Josie started the 1st grade.  She was puh-umped.

All day school… Lunch in the cafeteria… more nervous energy than she knew what to do with.

It was also the first day of KONNECT.  (KONNECT is our kids discipleship program.) Now that Josie is 6 years old, she gets to participate in KONNECT.  Again, she was puh-umped.

After picking the kids up from school, we ran some errands, horked down grabbed some dinner and headed off to church.  Josie was borderline psychotic clearly tired by the time we arrived at church.  She’d had a few melt-downs since leaving school.  I debated on the wisdom of sending her to church and thus being up 2 hours past her bedtime.  I envisioned the following morning and the probability of outbursts that register on the Richter scale.

Despite the wisdom of just keeping her home and allowing her opportunity to rest, I took her to church.

Why?

Numbers.

If she wasn’t there, it would count against our numbers.

Like I said, sometimes I do a good job of putting my family first… and then there are moments like these. 

(Cue music as she is crowned ‘Mother of the Year’)

In my walk with Jesus, I’ve learned the key factor to intimacy with Him is sharing the final 10%.

A friend of mine introduced me to that phrase a while back.  Applied to an accountability relationship, it’s sharing the details we’d prefer to keep to ourselves.

The details that reveal more about you than you wish.

The details that alter perceptions of you.

Apply this attitude to your relationship with Jesus, it’s the same details.  Only Jesus already knows them.

It took me years to be completely transparent with Jesus about my deepest fears and my darkest sins.  I figured, “Why talk to Him about it?  He knows.  Just allude to them, ask for strength and grace, then move on.”  There was no doubt I was broken.  No doubt I was grateful for the grace of Christ.  Yet my lack of honesty hindered my intimacy with Jesus.  My desperate attempts to hide from them only gave the enemy room to work.

Rather than those sins/fears fading off into the depths of my past they always seem to surface in difficult times. Not knowing what to do with them, I’d stuff them further… shut myself off from them and pretend they didn’t exist.

But Jesus knew they were there. He was just waiting for me to face them.

A few years ago I got gut-level honest with a friend. I shared the final 10%. And the enemy lost a little grip.

Over the past year I began facing those fears and sins with Jesus. I know He’s not surprised by them. I know He’s already forgiven them. But the honesty has allowed me to identify the actions that feed my fears… the missteps that fueled my sins.

The challenge seemed insurmountable. The process was exposing. The freedom was unexpected.

I don’t want to end this post with the ‘pivotal question’ that tosses the ball in your court in hopes that you’ll comment.  I’m not concerned with comments.  But I wonder how many of my blogging friends have been there. How many are there now.  How many continue to hide from the skeletons in their closets.

Let me encourage you. When things remain in the dark, the enemy has opportunity to work. When things are brought into the Light, the opportunity is lost and the enemy has no control.  You were created to experience Life.  Life in abundance.  Today.  Life is found in Christ where there is no condemnation.

If this post hits home at all… find your accountability partner, open the closet door, and share the final 10%.