Nothing bugs me more than the art of  positioning oneself.

It’s annoying.

There is no greater irritation than listening to someone talk about where they would rather be as opposed to where they are… especially when it comes to ministry.  Ministry roles are not rungs on a ladder.  Although I could write for a long time on the value of various ministry roles, I don’t think I need to.

Here’s the deal… If  I’m looking ahead for what God has next, I’m not focused on what He’s placed in front of me.  I can’t lead effectively that way.

Bloom where you’re planted.  Quit looking ahead at where God ‘might’ be leading you and make it happen where He has you today.  Let the next step take you by surprise.

That’s all I’m shoutin’.

1. 3rd time is NOT a charm
2. I’m no more patient now than I was the last time I did this

Okay… so there are only 2 right now.  But I’m sure a 3rd is coming.

i got on a rant today.  someone asked for my 2 cents… i gave a little extra.

a friend receieved an email from someone asking his opinion on divorce.  here was the question

Do you think it’s possible for God to allow a married couple (even after trying very hard to fix things) to fight so much to the point that they desperately want their single lives back, in order  to make the point that He didn’t want them to be together in the first place? 

i admit, i’ve never been in this place.  i cannot speak from experience.  but as a woman married for 14 years… here were my thoughts.

Whether God did or did not want them together at this point is no longer relevant.  If you made the wrong decision at ‘square one’, He will not draw you back to square one to remake the decision.  Instead He’ll start from where you are. 

I would question how much they’ve worked on their marriage.  How long?  How have they invested?  Counseling?  Mentoring? 

I have a seriously hard time believing that if they both truly wanted to make this work and were willing to throw off everything that hinders them in order to make it work that God won’t bless that.  God is the author of “that lovin’ feeling”.  So if they’ve lost it towards each other then they need to seek the only One that can give it back. 

It’s not an overnight solution.  It may take a long time.  But they have no kids.  They have only their jobs.  From my perspective they’ve got a lot of free time to focus on the right things that will make the relationship work.  

Whether or not God wanted them to become ‘one’ in marriage is irrelevant.  They are now one.  They need to do whatever is necessary to function as one rather than seeking validation to walk away from that.  

like i said… my two cents.  what would you say?

The phrase ‘Return On Investment’ is a key player in todays economy. No one wans to waste their resources.

We use MapQuest to find the most efficient route because we want to maximize our time.

We brag over bargains, drive an extra mile for a better gas price, and steal our neighbors Bed, Bath and Beyond coupon out of their mailbox in order to maximize our money.

(i can neither confirm nor deny the theft of any BB&Y coupon from said neighbor’s mailbox. that would be illegal. that’s not how i roll.)

Bottom line…

We want the best return for our investment.

If that is true, then why in the world do churches continue to disregard the kids church experience?

Here’s where I’m coming from…

A friend of mine traveled back home to visit family.  While there, they made the traditional trek to church on Sunday morning. Her two children ended up sitting in adult church with their parents b/c children’s church was cancelled. Why? Because the woman teaching was sick.  

That is sad.

So, the long and short of it is…  this church was not prepared for a great opportunity.  They weren’t positioned to get the most out of their time.  Why?

Of the 50 people sitting in the church pews that morning, there were 10 people with the greatest potential to say yes to Jesus… 10 people with more opportunities lying ahead of them to share Jesus… 10 people with the most potential to see more people come to faith in Jesus than walked on this earth a century ago.  Those 10 people happened to be from 6 to 12 years old.  

But who is the message geared toward? The 40 half-way-to-the-finish-line adults? Or the 10 just-past-the-starting-line kids?

Time is a commodity you can spend but never recover.  So, in this scenario… what’s the better return on investment? 

The same old worship experience for the adults?  Or a tweaked experience that incorporates the kids… one that ensures they understand the teaching?

Are you a small church without the resources for a full-blown kids ministry?  That’s okay.  It just means you do things a little differently.  You don’t have to look like every other church out there.  In fact… maybe God doesn’t want you to look like every other church out there.

Look different.  

Be different.  

The majority of churches in America are not exactly producing fully sold-out rock-your-face-off Christ followers.  

Maybe we need to quit telling parents how to raise their kids to follow Jesus and show them what it looks like.

Maybe we need to turn the church experience into an actual, hands-on workshop.

Maybe we need to shake things up.

• High School Musical on Ice – ‘nuf said

• My son’s homework was lost.  The frantic search ensued only to find it in the trash.  Underneath the coffee grounds.  Tossed out by yours truly.  

• Microphones should never be given to long-winded people.  If you can’t make your point in 3 minutes or less… give it up.  You lost your audience.

Sitting in the McDonald’s drive thru waiting to order a highly nutritious meal for my kids, I’m amused by the pictures on the drive-thru menu.

A perfectly assembled hamburger on a dinner plate sitting next to a bowl of fries. An elegant, sit-down meal.

It would be funny if it weren’t so ridiculous.

It’s the same smushed, less-than-picture-perfect, quasi-meat burger that’s about as healthy for you as a tapeworm.

Does sticking it on a dinner plate change anything?

You can put a pig in a gown and it doesn’t make it a princess.

It’s still a pig.

…when ordering a cup of straight, black joe from starbucks is unusual
…when customer service at the local tag agency is worse than wal-mart
…you laugh more at your jokes than your kids
…you spend an hour making dinner… 30 minutes listening to your kids complain with every bite… and the next 2 hours listening to them whine about being hungry

i’m just sayin’.

Setting:  Standing in line for a roller coaster at Frontier City…

Kyle:  “Aren’t those the sunglasses we got you for Mother’s Day over a year ago?”

Me:  with smug satisfaction, “Yep.”

Kyle:  “Wow.  That’s a record for you.”

Me:  “And you thought I couldn’t hang on to a pair of sunglasses.”

The sunglasses were left sitting on some random table at Frontier City. 

Isn’t that just how it is?

…called dinner.  Just can’t call it a day without that, right?

Some parents save for a college fund… we save for the counseling they’ll need for their abusive childhood.

Wind whips across the house, rattling the windows.  The weather alarm screams to life as thunder disrupts the pounding rain. 

I’m sitting in Kyle’s closet with all 3 kids. 

Keegan overdramatizes the moment asking all the ‘what if’ questions while Connor sits in my lap pulling on hangers.  I know by midnight I’ll be thankful for the sleeper pjs, but right now he’s making me sweat.

Josie closes her eyes and prays for everyone on the earth to be safe… amen.

A precious moment to savor… only to be interrupted by the apparent ‘prayer’ fatique that suddenly overcame her. 

In a huge, overexageratted sigh, she says, “There… I did it.”  She melts into her pillow as if she just fought the battle of armageddon, itself.

Like a cross between James Brown (I can’t go on.  I can’t go on.)  and Benny Hinn (Be Heyaled, my brother). 

Oh my word.